This is a deep theological question that leaves most of us with our mouths gaping and no answer. We're rendered speechless and refer them to the local pastor or some kind of book, such as James Dobson's book on the subject. In fact, volumes have been written in an attempt to answer this dilemma that stretches back to the beginning of time.
I was reading Oswald Chambers this week and this sentence jumped out at me…
"Why shouldn't we experience heartache?"
He goes on to say, "Through those doorways God is opening up ways of fellowship with His Son. Most of us collapse at the first grip of pain. We sit down at the door of God's purpose and enter a slow death through self-pity. And all the so-called Christian sympathy of others helps us to our deathbed. But God will not. He comes with the grip of the pierced hand of His Son, as if to say, "Enter into fellowship with Me; arise and shine." If God can accomplish His purposes in this world through a broken heart, then why not thank Him for breaking yours?" Oswald Chambers
Ouch. I'm guilty of self-pity. And I don't like pain. How many of us do? I'm afraid I've collapsed at the door of pain many times and prevented my healing.
He also describes a God who uses tough love on us to produce a child who can eventually, "arise and shine." His methods will differ with each child, just as we parent our children based on their personality and temperament. But we can rest in His unchanging and unconditional love while in the process.
I'm not there yet. I've a ways to go.
I'm beginning to understand how He can use a broken vessel much better than one that's never even had a crack. If you've never had a need, how can you empathize with one who's hurting. As He has put me back together, I want the affects of His love and mercy to pour through me and touch those whom I come into contact. There has to be a purpose for the messy life or it was all in vain. I don't believe He would've allowed it unless He planned to use it.
So this Thanksgiving season, I'm going to raise my hands in surrender and thank Him for a messy, broken life. He can use it however He chooses.
How about you? Have you been broken and asked the question, "why?" You've done all the right things, played by the rules and life hasn't been fair?
I've asked God that question my entire life and He was silent until now. Your answer will be different from mine. It's alright to ask, He's big enough for our questions.
Just know He loves you with a love that is holy and surpasses anything the human mind can perceive and He will be faithful. His promises have stood the test of time. And when He's finished, you'll be thankful for the brokenness, for without it, you wouldn't have needed Him as much.